There is a saying that love makes the world go around. There are movies and books about love. Love has been seen as being connected with the highest frequencies and God energy. There are many forms and many beliefs associated with love.
Avoiding confrontation or wanting to please other people is often more important to us than our own integrity and needs. When you’re challenged with expressing your opinion or needs, always remember that the way you do it, when coming from love for yourself, is reflected in your tone and way of speaking. This reflection of love will help those around you to understand your case. If they cannot, you can let any disappointment go with the knowledge that they are doing the best that they can and have also the right to be who they are—even though who they are may not be pleasant for you.
When you have a basis of love for yourself, you will not be as dependent on the opinion of others. You are more like a tree taking root than a leaf in the breeze of other people’s opinions and needs. This in turn supports other people. You are a constant rather than another uncertainty that they have to deal with in their lives. You have more chance of supporting them, and they will know where they stand with you.
Look internally for approval, not to your spouse or friends or family for love and approval. It has to feel like it comes from you. Every time you are disappointed in someone’s reaction or attention, go inward; this means you have not given yourself the feeling of love you are seeking.
When you can love yourself unconditionally:
- You have learned to forgive yourself for perceived imperfections.
- You have learned to listen to yourself.
- You have learned to respect your own opinion.
- You have learned to express yourself.
- You have learned to acknowledge the attributes you have, as well as the accomplishments in your life.
- You are comfortable with what you are and are not.
- You have learned that your voice matters.
All these things add up to unconditional love and patience for yourself.
Some excerpts from Spiritual Reality: Transforming the Ordinary into the Extraordinary by Lydia Anne Mitchell, Ph. D.